In April, nearly a month after the birth of our precious son, I announced via the blog that he was born. I ambitiously promised his “birth story” within a few weeks.
Um… fail, I guess?
Truly, I was undone. I admire the moms post birth who are showering and doing their make up and making sense. But…. that was just NOT ME. All that to say, I finally feel like a (mostly) normal person again and I want to share ALL THE THINGS about Beck coming into this world. Also, I feel like it’s a great story! So, without further ado, Beckstrom’s Birth Story (9 months later).
On March 21, 2017, I called my OB several times throughout the day. I talked to her nurse various times complaining of a weird sensation/pushing feeling that I didn’t know how to describe exactly. They recommended what they always do… drink lots of water, lay down, take it easy etc. and call us if this, this or this happens (every expectant mother knows the drill, right?!) I couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right. But, alas, after a sort of of crappy day, I called it and went to bed early.
March 22 I woke up and felt great. I had to be to work a little bit early to travel to a home visit about 1 hour from my office. I got up, showered, went to work and immediately took a work vehicle to my meeting. I arrived at their home around 9 AM. The family welcomed me into their home and we sat down at their kitchen counter. Within 5 minutes I felt a slight trickle and became embarrassed and uncomfortable. I shifted slightly, confused (I didn’t think I had to pee? But what do I know?) and put my foot down on the floor. As soon as this motion was complete, all hell broke loose. And when I say all hell, I mean ALL THE WATER. When I have told this story in the past, people want graphic details. “Was it like you wet your pants?” Um, nope. More like someone dumped a feed bucket of water next to me. I think there was a splash but I can’t confirm that 100% due to my shock, horror, and ultimate terror. I truly thought your water breaking, in that fashion, was something that happened strictly in movies. I had never even entertained the what ifs of it!
Luckily for me, I was surrounded by the sweetest family and the most caring co worker. Both moms themselves, they assured me (while my hands trembled and tears ran down my face) that this WAS happening. And it was okay. I tried to call my husband but my phone had crappy service and I could not get through. No worries since the unending flow had yet to cease… I wasn’t going anywhere at the moment. Though I was terrified and worried, I was also mortified at the situation. Here I was, causing the biggest MESS at essentially a stranger’s home, and now sitting in their bathroom waiting for the horror to end.
20 minutes later, I had finally reached Clay, he was beyond confused, but agreed to meet me at the hospital. My co worker packed me up in her vehicle, with new leggings and a towel to sit on, and we headed for the hospital (which was a good 45 minutes away). I could NOT process what was going on.
Maybe I should back up to say my due date was April 22, exactly one month to go! In fact, I had my first “check” that afternoon at 3 pm! I was excited to make sure baby was in place. This was NOT what I had envisioned. The whole car ride was surreal. I was calling Clay, having him pack my hospital bag “Um, grab a nursing tank. I think? And ummm.. maybe some underwear. Oh! And mascara. Yeah, thats the stuff you put on your eyelashes. Look in the bathroom.” Calling my supervisor, “Can you please come and get this work car that I am leaving at this person’s house?” And mostly, just completely panicking. Baby room, not done. Baby clothes, not put away. Nothing hung on the walls because procrastination. Amy, my co worker and complete savior in this situation, was so calm. We chatted about having a baby on the way. She kept asking me if I felt ok, and truly, I did! I didn’t feel any different than I had when I woke up, except that my clothes were sopping wet. When we finally arrived, she dropped me off at the front of the hospital (into the care of a nurse with a wheel chair) and wished me luck.
As soon as I was checked in, it was all business and FAST. First, they wanted to test the fluid to make sure it was amniotic fluid and not just a paranoid FTM who had an “accident.” I assured them there was no way I could ever pee that much. They tested it, and claimed they couldn’t get a good read, so it had to be sent to the lab. So we waited. The nurse came in to “check” me. She asked if he had moved in to place and I said I was supposed to have an appointment that afternoon to find out. Within 10 seconds she said “I’m pretty sure thats a foot. You need to prepare yourself for a C-section.” I started crying and blubbering like a mess. The nurse held my hand and told me this truly was the best for me and the baby. All of my fears and expectations about delivery were gone, and replaced by new fears that I hadn’t even thought about yet.
During that time, Clay showed up AND I started having contractions. He held my hand while I grimaced through some intense pains. finally, my OB showed up with test results. Confirmed, it was amniotic fluid. Five minutes later, by ultrasound, they confirmed what the nurse had already suspected. He was breach. I had Clay text my parents and my sister. I wanted them to know we were at the hospital and that I was okay. That was ALL he had time for because within minutes they were prepping me and giving me the dreaded needle, which was my least favorite part of the entire process.
Due to my previous career as a Surgical Tech, I had participated in many of c sections and knew that they were snappy. I told Clay just that as they wheeled me back. “He’s going to be here in just a few minutes!” I was so excited and nervous.
From the moment they pinched my stomach and I confirmed I had no feeling, to the moment I felt them pull his body out of me, were a complete blur. It seemed like minutes, thought only seconds, before I heard him cry and I kept asking Clay “Is he okay? Is he okay?” Clay was saying yes and soon they laid him on my chest. He was so perfect and my heart ached with happiness.
I urged Clay to follow wherever the baby went while they stitched me up. Our sweet Beckstrom Alan had arrived. Beckstrom is Clay’s mom’s maiden name, and an easy decision to carry on his family name. Alan is Clay’s middle name, also an easy choice!
From there, we found out Beck had to go to the NICU. I was 35 and 6 days, just short of of the NICU cut off and so he had to go for precautionary measures. This was incredibly hard on us and may be a story to share another day.
The way Beck entered into the world was FAST and FORCEFUL and now, knowing him as we do, I would expect nothing less. I thank God everyday for making me a mom, but mostly for making me Beck’s mom. His smile lights up our world and watching him discover anything and everything is the most joyful thing. All of the tears, the sleepless days (nights, months…) were/are worth it every morning when I see his chubby cheeks and sweet eyes. We are so thankful for the best thing that has ever happened to us.